It’s My Day on Smartly

red alert, red alert...   savor the ride readers: a rewritten version of the favorite remote control post is published today on smartlyThis is an awesome online magazine.

I’m proud to say I have had an article published monthly since its inception. Essays are diverse, with different subjects written every day.

What I find most exciting is Smartly is published under 5 area banners: Geo-Neutral, New York, Chicago, Southern California and Anonymous. Areas on the launching pad include The Bay Area Cities, Minneapolis, D.C., Austin, Philadelphia, Denver and University.

Take a break, read posts from writers across the country– tell your friends about smartly!

Control of the Remote Control

What is the connection between men and remote controls? Seems an anatomical connection exists in most homes in America. Such is the case in our home.

With  Deadliest Catch blasting at concert level volume, I ask LT to turn the volume down. He has dozed off on his recliner. After  futile attempts to elicit a response, I walk over to retrieve this prized possession. Not surprisingly, LT has a death grip on it.

I know what is coming next, yet I still  jump and scream when he wakes up with a deer in the headlights look, eying  me suspiciously. I feel like a teenager stealing Dad’s car keys.

Once again, I walk back to the sofa and sit down. Five minutes later, the scenario plays out again-I once mentioned the idea of getting an additional remote control for me to use when he dozes off. LT was insulted that I would suggest he dozes.

Last year I purchased a remote control holder for LT. The last time I saw him that excited was when he purchased his Rolex.

I am not alone. Evidently, men’s almost anatomical affinity for television remote-control devices exists in most homes. One of their favorite pastimes is rolling through the TV guide’s log at NASCAR speed. I do not realize I am holding my breath as LT hovers over How’s It Made or  DirtyJob . Inside I exhale when the cursor lands on Deadliest Catch, Construction Intervention, or Ice Road Truckers Don’t forget the list of approved choices?

I mentioned to LT that remote controls were the topic of the day. A man of few words, he replied, “the remote control is mine. ”

As do most women, I knew when we married my days of clicking through the channels were over.

Now I just need to remember to breathe during the selection process.

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